Tuesday, September 9, 2014

A whole lot of a whole lot


You dirty dogs. 

I write post after post with photos and updates and whatever else, all of it mildly received (at best), and then I do a myspace survey and the whole dang blog blows up. Apparently all y'all like reading inane shit sometimes. Anyway, since then, I done got busy. I don't know why I'm talking like a hick, maybe because it's past midnight and I'm feeling a little loopsy. I've had nonstop visitors for the last three weeks, and my house sometimes feels like a hostel with people always coming through and me only stopping long enough between them to clean their sheets and towels. I've got my last visitor coming this week, and I'm so SO excited to see her, but before we get to that, let's look at some mediocre photos of the last couple of weeks. 

 I took myself to the movies to see Boyhood. I did not like it very much at all, and I think I'm in the minority on that one but I'm just going to have to live with that. Had it been about a real family I would have found it completely fascinating, but staging all these small moments in the kid's life just seemed a little silly to me. 

 We went to the craft store. 

 We didn't buy these, but we should have. 

 Darts were thrown. I love a good game of darts (or three), but I'm starting to get particular and I only want to play with metal-tipped darts on cork boards. 

 We went for a morning hike, and I realized that this kid weighs a lot more in the backpack than he did a year ago. 

 We didn't find Bigfoot, but it wasn't for lack of trying. 

 I admired flowers because what else is new. 

 We went to the Oregon Zoo!!!!! And I thought about stealing this sign to bring home with me. 

 Aye. 

 This kid!!!!!!!! 

 We ran around the backyard all afternoon, stopping at times to pick tomatoes, and I managed to make this miniature crop circle before he walked over and started throwing them. 

 I made a miniature friend. I feel like as a child I used to see so many more red ladybugs. I wonder why that is. Maybe because I'm not so low to the ground anymore. 

 We threw flowers at each other. 

 I loved every second. 

 And then my dear and darling Jim came to visit! His first request was Jack in the Box. He got a taco that didn't much look like a taco, but he ate it anyway. 

 We hauled off to the woods in the rain and tried to make the best of it. 

 On a clear day, you'd see Mount Hood in this photo. Womp womp. 

 It rained on us for more of the day than not. 

 A summation of our camping trip. 

 I forgot to mention that Jim wore a poncho for the duration of the evening. I settled for a raincoat like a normal human being. 

 We woke up the next day and it was still gloom city, so we packed up our junk and got outta there.

 Somehow, someway, Jim had never been to the ocean before. So we did something I've always wanted to do and woke up in the mountains and got to the beach in the afternoon. 

 Jim liked my favorite stretch of coast as much as I do, which was a relief. I think we were both just mainly relieved that it wasn't raining anymore. 

 We read funny facts about our old high school classmate turned NFL player.

 He was concerned about something, apparently. 

 On Monday the sun came out and we hightailed it to the river, like one does out here.

 I jumped off some rocks and Jim documented it. 

 Then Jim left and an old family friend showed up and we ate tamales. 

 And this little prince looked cute as ever. 

 This guy! 

 I decided to make up for the rainy weekend and drive back to the mountains on Friday to catch a glimpse of this view. 

 And then I had this whole lake to myself, which was incredible beautiful. 

 And then Frame and I spent half an hour trying to talk. It never worked. He tries every day though, so I really admire his determination. 

 Kari and I (did I mention she lives with me now? I don't think I did. She lives with me now. If you are my friend in real life then you obviously already know this. And if you aren't my friend in real life then what the heck are you doing here?) spent Friday night at Multnomah. It was her first time! My tenth. At least. 

And then we hiked to the top in the name of exercise, which was embarrassingly difficult. 

 I stopped to take a lot of photos, partly because it was beautiful and partly because my legs were telling me that they were not going to move one more step. 

 Theres a 600 foot waterfall right below her. She gave me a brief rundown of her will before she hopped that fence. 

 I don't give the Gorge enough attention. I'm always either in the mountains or at the beach, but the Gorge is really where it's at. 

 This marionberry cobbler was also where it's at. 

 We went to the beach! And slept over! 

 I poked around on the cliffs by myself because apparently I have no concern for safety. 

 We made a short stop at Rogue, which was pretty effin impressive. 

 The city greeted us with its finest. 

 I took this photo no more than 45 seconds after waking up, because although I could tell that something very unnatural was happening with my bangs, I decided I needed visual proof. Thank god for that decision. 

 And then I bought a box full of summer. 

All that remained after boiling, blanching, peeling, cutting, pitting, jarring, and boiling tomatoes for my grandma. Because when a 97-year-old woman wants canned tomatoes to keep her happy for the winter, you stay up til midnight to make sure it happens. (But don't tell her because it's a Christmas surprise.) 


The end. I'm exhausted just reliving these last two weeks. Goodnight. 

Friday, August 29, 2014

You're gonna laugh at me

I'm just sitting here, on a Friday night, trying to decide what my wedding song would be if I were to get married tomorrow. So before you start laughing about the sorry state of my life (I think I'd choose Romeo and Juliet by Dire Straits, but Maybe I'm Amazed is also a contender), lemme just do a lil bit of 'splainin. I think about questions like these all day long. Usually they aren't quite so outrageous, but I do. If I were leaving right this second and never coming back, what's the one album I'd take with me? (Grass Roots - Their 16 Greatest Hits.) What's really my favorite flower? (Lilacs.) And on and on. I quiz myself about little things all the time. I play out scenarios based on my scenarios, and it goes on and on and on. I hope to god I'm not the only person who does this, although I presume that I am. Anyway, thinking about that question tonight got me thinking about those fantastic "myspace surveys" we all used to do; a million little questions in a survey that we'd fill out and post on our myspace pages and aol profiles. You know what I'm talking about. Anyway, they're incredibly asinine most of the time, not to mention completely self-serving, but I actually really enjoyed reading the answers of my friends (and people I hardly knew) because people were generally pretty honest on them since they were really only answering them for themselves. I think it's pretty easy to fall into a routine of waking up and going to work and coming home and exercising and eating dinner and watching tv and going to bed and never doing a whole lot of critical thinking, whether about ourselves or about the rest of the world, so those little quizzes were kind of smart because they got us thinking.

I think you know where this is going.

Since it's a Friday night, and I'm at home alone with a bottle of beer that my boss gave me this afternoon (thanks, boss!), and since I have a big weekend starting in the morning and mostly because I have nothing better to do at the present moment, I found myself a myspace quiz. That is actually what I typed into google: "myspace surveys". Up popped a goldmine, replete with clip art from the late 90s.

I also haven't read any of the questions in this quiz, so this should be a lot of fun, and totally not sophomoric at all.




A

A- Available: Yes!


A- Age: 24 and 11/12ths.


A- Annoyance: Oh man. Only one?! Freight trains as of late. I'm stopped by one near-daily.


B


B- Best Friend: littleboo1088.


B- Birthday: September the 23rd.


B- Brand of cell phone: A cracked Apple.


C


C- Crush: I should have known this question would be on here. I'm going to plead the fifth. Sorry.


C- Car: Suzy the Jetta, 8 years and counting.


C- Candy: Does Reese's count? Because I choose those. There is no close second.


D


D- Day or Night: Day. Day is when you see all the flowers.


D- Dream Car: I don't have one of those. Cheap date, huh?


D- Dog: Specific? Judy. Vague? Australian shepherds.


E


E- Easiest Person to Talk to: So many! Beth. Kari. My sister. Babies who don't understand language quite yet.


E- Eggs: Frittata-ed.


E- Earnings: Enough.


F


F- Favorite Month: MaySeptemberDecember. This one hasn't changed since my high school days.


F- Favorite Color: Most days it's green. Some days, yellow. But always always, the color of the sky on a perfect Midwest afternoon.


F- Favorite Memory: Whoa baby! I'll have to come back to this one. Okay I'm back (really I did finish the rest of the quiz and then come back). I think my general favorite memories just revolve around everything related to growing up with Abby and Beth. Sleepovers at their houses 5x a week, watching the OC obsessively, getting ready for dances, having parties, making Jackson 5 lanyards, driving anywhere and everywhere, trips to Arizona, weekends in Colorado, middle of the night trips to Jewel, that one time when we decided to stay up all night and walked around the neighborhood at sunrise, watching Moulin Rouge in the basement of the old lake house, LNSG, LH3, french fry Fridays, Ireland, etc etc.


G


G- Gummy Bears or Worms: Wormies.


G- Giver or Taker: Giver. Always. Although taking is pretty nice once in a while.


G- Graduated: From kindergarten, and from middle school, and high school, and college!


H


H- Hair Color: Brown turned blonde.


H- Height: Five feet and ten inches.


H- Happy: Very very very much so. I just smiled as I wrote that, matterafact.


I


I- Ice Cream: Mint Oreo Blizzard.


I- Instrument: I don't know how to play a lick of any of them. I like the sound of pianos and violins though.


I- Insecurity: b-o-d-y-i-m-a-g-e


J


J- Jewelry: I used to wear so much! One ring is plenty these days. Sometimes a pair of earrings is nice.


J- Job: Nanny!!!!


J- Jail: No?


K


K- Kids: Yes. But I get paid to take care of them.


K- Kickboxing or Karate: Karate.


K- Kindergarten: Did it. Loved it.


L


L- Longest Car Ride: Nonstop from Boulder to Chicago during a snowstorm.


L- Last kiss: Last week. WHO'S ASKING?!


L- Lipstick or Lip gloss: Stick ick ick.


M


M- Milk Flavor: Chocolate!


M- Most Missed Memory: My childhood imagination.


M- Movie: Matilda. One and only, forever.


N



N- Number of Siblings: 3. 6 if you count the in-laws! (I do.)


N- Number of Tattoos: Uno.


N- Name: Alexe.


O


O- One Wish: Call me optimistic, but world peace would really be nice.


O- One Phobia: I don't know, man. Ever since I heard that story (last week) about the Chinese chef who cut the snake's head off and then it bit him and killed him twenty minutes later, I've been a little wary of snakes. Not like I've encountered any. But I'd like to keep it that way.


O- One Regret: Not studying abroad in college. I'll regret it forever.


P


P- Pet Peeves: Others standing next to me while I'm sitting. Generally rude people. Kiwis (the fruit).


P- Part of Your Appearance You Like Best: Tush, usually.


P- Part of Your Personality: What about it? that I like best? Just a part of it that I have? How about that I'm a goof like 90% of the time?


Q


Q- Quote: "Having fun isn't hard when you've got a library card." -Arthur


Q- Quick or Slow: Oh, I don't know. Are we talking waiting for pizza to cook or dial-up speeds or length of playoff basketball games? I'm generally happy with something right in the middle.


Q- Quiet or Loud? This is genuinely a terrible question.


R


R- Reason to Smile: There are 4 vases of flowers at the table I'm sitting at. Plus 7 succulents and a plant.


R- Reality TV Show: Guys. I need to tell you something. Earlier this summer, I decided to watch an episode of The Bachelorette just to see how truly terrible it is. I've bashed it since its inception (conception? inception I think.) and figured I probably should actually watch it to see what it is I hate about it so much. Well, weeks and weeks later I found myself TEARING UP at the finale. So, yeah. Don't worry, I hate myself for it, too.


R- Reason to Cry: The other night I went to the movies, and just as the movie was starting a man walked in and just stood near the door for a few minutes. Even two or three years ago I would have thought nothing of that, but all I could think was that there was a chance, however small it was, that the man was angry about something or had been laid off or divorced that day, and he had chosen that movie theater to take his aggression out on. And that thought made me want to cry. (Turns out, he was just waiting for his wife to get out of the bathroom before sitting down.)


S


S- Song Last Heard: George Ezra - Budapest.


S- Season: I sure do like me some fall and some spring. Also early winter and early summer. But whatever we're on now (late summer?) is pretty good too. So, everything but February.


S- Shoe: I'm pretty partial to my Saltwaters these days.


T


T- Time You Woke Up: 6:36 am.


T- Time Now: 10:52 pm.


T- Time you wish it was: Tool time.


U


U- Umbrella design/Color: Is this real?


U- Under your bed: Boxes. And backpacks and sheets and books.


U- Underwear: Pervy 14-year-olds.


V


v- Vegetable You Hate: I'm not really down with mushrooms, but I don't hate them.


V- Vacation Spot: Pacific Northwest, please.


V- Voting: Yes, I do that.


W



W- Worst Habits: I lack self control in most things. I also swear too much in front of strangers.


W- Where Are You Going to Travel Next: In state: Mt Hood National Forest. Out of state: MONTANA! Wait. Seattle first. THEN MONTANA!


W- Weather Right Now: Night. Clear. Normal night weather?


X


X- X-Rays: Pathetic attempt at an x question. Yes, I've had x-rays because I'm a human adult.


X- X-Cited about: My weekend! And the next few weekends! And fall! And next year!


X- X-tra Credit for: WHAT DOES THIS EVEN MEAN STUPID MYSPACE QUIZ


Y



Y- Year You Were Born: 1989.


Y- Year it is Now: 2014.


Y- Yellow: Is a very good color.


Z


Z- Zoo Animal: I went to the zoo today! I saw bears and beavers and elephants and a couple of sleepy warthogs. But usually the lions and tigers are my favorites.


Z- Zero tolerance for: Blatant disrespect, especially in a racial context.


Z- Zzzzz What time do you go to bed? Now-ish.




Well, that wasn't particularly enlightening. I guess I forgot how few deep questions life had for us when we were barely teenagers. But anyway. Now I can say I did a myspace quiz at age 24. And that's something!*


*No it's not.

Sunday, August 24, 2014

Friends and Flowers


It's been a day for being outdoors. Who am I kidding, this whole dang summer has been one for the outdoors. This has been one of the most consistently lovely summers I can remember; which probably means like for the last fifteen years? Anyway, there are some days when it's a tinge too hot to enjoy anything other than air conditioning or a slip n slide, but for the most part it's been sunny and just warm enough every day. I spent the first half of the summer outdoors all the time and the second half of the summer outdoors half of the time, and inside napping, feeling guilty the other half. Because it's not truly summer unless you feel guilty every time you choose to hang out at home rather than climb a mountain or jump in a river or any other number of absurd outdoor activities available here. Anyway. Photos. Some indoors, some out. 


 My Kar Bear came to visit for the umpteenth time, and it was one of our best trips yet. We had dinner at Luc Lac, a Vietnamese restaurant that I'm pretty partial to. And only partly because of the bonkers good food. 

 After drinking roughly 5 tequila cocktails, I realized it was National IPA day so I sucked it up and got one. I've got a love-hate relationship with the old india pale ale. Some days it's the best thing I can imagine drinking, other days it tastes like hopped up garbage. 

 The beauty of this photo is that you can't tell if it was taken indoors or out. I'll never tell. (We were watching American Ninja Warrior on the couch.) 

 A crazy insane thing happened, where I went to the Commons, the brewery I go to a hundred times a week, and there was a Judy doppelgänger there. This pup's name was Mosley and had a patch of white on his chest, but other than that he and Judy were the exact same dog. I showed his owners photos. We were all in awe. 

 Just wouldn't be a set of photos without some Gus thrown in. I know I'm biased, but COME ON! Those dimples? Those chubby arms? Gah. My sister knows how to make em, that's for sure. 

 Trip two to the Commons. I wasn't kidding. They know me by name. 

 A hot effin' day that required a visit to the splash pad. Daner and I spent 7/10ths of the afternoon chasing pigeons. Fine with me. 

 Probably the cutest human to ever be wrapped in a Victoria's Secret towel. 

Garden grubbin'. 

 We spent an afternoon picking flowers and arranging them. She makes a good model. 

 Car giardiniera. Cardiniera?

 My eyes are not the same color here, thank you very much glasses, but my darlin Izzy came to visit! We took a lot of shots over the course of 5 days. Like a lot. Like even a shot of gin.

 He loves the camera more than just about anything, besides pickles and pizza and dancing. 

 Bucktown Pub reunion! I love visitors! 

 Spent a day with this little darling. Her favorite food is burritos. 

 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 We spent an afternoon at a swimming hole, and I was in l-o-v-e. It was deep enough for me to swim around in, and I even jumped off a sorta-tall rock that probably wasn't more than 8 feet but felt like an eternity to me. And then I did it again. 

 This photo is blurry because when you host a pizza party, you don't take a lot of time to photograph it. 

 .....And then the confetti came out. 

 He was happier than he looks about being covered in confetti. I think. 

 River pickles. This is me summed up in one photo, I think. 

 And then this morning I lived a little dream and went out to an island and picked a bucket of flowers. 

 I am so, so so so so so unbelievably excited to play with flowers for a living. The only very small minor teeny-tiny issue is that I'm 90% sure I'm allergic to multiple varieties of flowers. Oy.

 There are few things happier than a field full of sunflowers. 

 I took a wander around the neighborhood this evening, in typical Sunday fashion. This rose was particularly stunning. 

And I made a short stop at my favorite Portland bridge on the way home from the flower massacre. This view truly doesn't get old. The good ones never do.